If We Were Having Coffee

A couple weeks ago, I read this post on the Perpetual Page-Turner and absolutely loved it! It’s a virtual coffee date, and reading it made me feel connected to Jamie, the Perpetual Page-Turner. (Yes, we have the same name!) It got me thinking… connections are important. Sharing our thoughts, celebrating our triumphs and admitting our worries and fears are important. Sometimes as a writer (and a person) I feel disconnected from the outside, socializing, beer-drinking, bar-going world. Sometimes I even feel disconnected from the writerly, readerly, bloggerly community (as I mentioned last week) and writing/talking/sharing can help overcome that feeling. So…

 

 

If We Were Having Coffee… I’d tell you that I just read A Thousand Pieces of You by Claudia Gray and loved it so much I finished it in one day! Which is saying something because I worked for six hours and spent time with my boyfriend that same day. The main character, Marguerite, is strong and adventurous. She doesn’t freak out or back down, even when her journey chasing her father’s killer takes her to alternate universes in London, St. Petersburg and in a city under the ocean. Plus, Paul and Theo?! YUM! I loved this book so much that it’s my next Six Star Review, which I’ll be posting two weeks from today. A Thousand Pieces of You comes out November 4^th and I definitely recommend it!

What are you reading right now? What’s the last book you read that you couldn’t put down?

 

If We Were Having Coffee… I’d tell you that I set aside the WIP that I’ve been working on for four years, and I’m a bit heartbroken about it. I set Loyalties Lie aside because I want to participate in NaNoWriMo this year, but I’m not ready to write the sequel. Plus, I was struggling with editing, so I decided take a three month break from the draft to work on a new idea during NaNoWriMo. I plan on returning to edits in January.

Have you ever set aside an important project? Did you return to it?

 

If We Were Having Coffee… I’d tell you that I’m nervous for NaNoWriMo this year. For the first time, I’m diving in with a brand new idea that I’ve only been developing for a month. It’s not fleshed out, and I haven’t decided yet if that’s a good thing or a very, very bad thing. Just because it’s my third time participating in NaNo doesn’t mean that this year will be a success. Actually, I feel like this year it’s more likely that I won’t win. And that thought frightens me.

What frightens you right now, if anything? How are you dealing with it?

 

If We Were Having Coffee… I’d tell you that my coffee isn’t actually coffee. I’m drinking a Salted Carmel Hot Chocolate because I gave up the real stuff in February. At first it was excruciating, but now I know it was for the best. I still get tired, but I never hit the lows of pure exhaustion that a few days or even hours without espresso would bring on before. So I’m back to just being dependent on chapstick.

What did you order? Something with espresso? (If so, can I smell it? Mmm thanks.)

 

Feel free to answer the questions I posed above in the comments below (if you’re comfortable sharing, of course)! I promise I’ll respond, however it might not be right away. I’m on the road today, and tomorrow I’ll be exploring the Wizarding World of Harry Potter! Pictures next week! 

I’d love to hear from you!

Why I'm Struggling to Write

The short and simple answer: Life.

Life gets in the way of writing. Packing, moving, unpacking, decorating, working. Cleaning, organizing, grocery shopping, new apartment shopping, working. Reading, blogging, tweeting. Working. Spending time with my (live-in!) boyfriend. Living.

Technically, it all gets in the way of writing. (But some things must.)

I chose to focus on unpacking before writing, thinking the sooner I got the former done then the sooner I would get back to the latter. Now all that’s left to do is to hang a few pictures, but I have yet to seriously get back to writing. I’ve thought about my WIP. I’ve opened Scrivener. Jotted down some ideas. Talked about it with my boyfriend (who read a partial draft last month). I recorded some plot changes on my phone.

But actual editing? Actual writing? Not so much.

It’s all about time. No, that’s not true. I’ve had time.

It’s about decisions. Making a decision to write instead of doing the dishes (though they need to be done eventually). Making a decision to write instead of watching the next episode of Buffy on Netflix. (It’s my first time watching the series and I’m engrossed in season three). Making a decision to write instead of reading another chapter. I wish I could say making a decision to write instead of work… but I kind of need the money. (And I like my job.)

Basically, making the decision to write instead of doing unimportant things.

I recently saw a quote from a writer about this on Tumblr. (Specific, I know.) I think it was Stephen King and he said something like: he writes first because writing is important. He decides to do it before all the unimportant things. Of course now I can’t find this quote… But that’s not important; the message is important. Write first, before all the other things.

This morning I have an hour before my boyfriend wakes (I really need a codename for him, something nicer than Yeti and more original than Lover), then I leave for work shortly after. In an hour, I’ll reacquaint myself with my WIP.

And tomorrow I’ll get back to writing. I have ALL MORNING both Monday and Tuesday.

So, I will write/edit for two hours on Monday and three hours on Tuesday.

Five hours of writing to start the week off strong.

Hold me to it, internets.

 

This Post is not about Dying, but about Living

Death is not convenient. Loss is not easy. As humans, we wouldn’t want it the other way around. We want to feel connections wholly, even if it means there will be emptiness when we lose someone.

Lose. A nuance of the English language. To lose someone, like they took a wrong turn on the way home from the grocery, or simply got separated in a crowd.

Maybe we use that word because the other one is too difficult to say. We’d rather not admit it to ourselves, let alone to others. Of course, maybe there’s also an innate hope that the loss is not irretrievable. That it can be reversed. That the person can be found again, someday.

In a time when I am experiencing loss, it occurred to me to make a list of YA books with themes of dying. The first book that popped into mind was The Fault in Our Stars. But then I remembered that somewhere, sometime, I heard someone (maybe John Green?) describe The Fault in Our Stars as a book that isn’t about dying, but about living.

Which sounds happier, more optimistic and all around better. Especially to me, right now.

So here are four YA novels, that aren’t about dying, but about LIVING:

If I Stay - Gayle Forman

In this hovering-at-the-edge tale, Mia chooses between life and death after a fatal accident claims her parents’ lives. When I finished If I Stay, I was reminded that every day we choose whether to live or die. It takes courage to make that choice. And courage to decide the extent to which we fulfill it.

 

 
The Sky is Everywhere - Jandy Nelson

When Lennie’s older sister dies abruptly, Lennie is catapulted from the shadows to center stage of her own life. Upon finishing The Sky is Everywhere, I was reminded that it takes time to accept loss. It’s not something we come to terms with overnight. Losing someone affects us; it affects our decisions and how we view the world around us.

 

The Spectacular Now - Tim Tharp

When life-of-the-party Sutter meets social disaster Aimee, he takes it upon himself to show her how to live in the now. Of course, it doesn’t turn out how either of them expected. When it comes to The Spectacular Now, it’s really all in the name. It’s another way of saying: live in the moment. You can fret about the past and prepare for the future, but how you live in the present is life. It is being alive.

 

The Fault in Our Stars - John Green

Hazel Grace Lancaster is terminal, but when she meets Augustus Waters at a cancer support group, their heartwarming love leads their stories to be rewritten. When I set down The Fault in Our Stars, I stood up. I got in my car, picked up my boyfriend and drove to one of the settings mentioned in the book. TFIOS is that inspiring. It made me want to live. Right away.

The movie trailer, released this week, might give you some idea as to its power.

Okay, this got a little bit COMPLETELY DRENCHED in clichés. Sorry. #notsorry

But just one more, before I go: Live a life worth living.

 

This post is dedicated to my beautiful, strong grandmother, who passed away Friday after a long and joyous life.

Keeping Up the Juggling Act of Writing and Life

Juggling my work, passion and everything else seems to be more of a job than anything these days. In balancing my work and passion (which I posted about last month), I have so many balls in the air that I’ve created an unsteady balance, which I’m desperately trying to keep manageable. Metaphorically, I’ve become quite the juggler. Luckily I’m a natural at organization (thanks Mom & Dad for those genes!) so it’s not as difficult as it could be to keep everything straight. However, sometimes it seems that if I get distracted in making sure one ball flies high, the rest might tumble down on my head.

Then at least I'd have my own ball pit to go nuts in.

Here’s what I have in the air at the moment:

Passion:

·         Novel Writing

·         Short Story Writing

·         Blogging

·         Tribe Writers course

·         Freelance work

·         Reading (books, blogs, etc.)

 

Work:

·         Work #1: Bookstore

·         Work #2: Bank

Personal:

·         Boyfriend time

·         Family time

·         Me time

·         Cleaning/Cooking/Keeping my life livable

I have to admit that I don’t spit my focus equally. If I tried, I would likely fail. But I think the point is to keep all these aspects of my life in the air, yet really concentrate on two or three at a time. I strive to make sure that all my focuses are kept at a manageable level (clean clothes to wear, blog kept up-to-date, showing up at work on time and with a smile) but I need to ensure that I’m thriving at the most important.

Some suggestions that help:

1.       Write every day! Or (if I’m working a double) at least contemplate my story daily to keep the plot and my characters in the front of my mind

2.       Passion first: On my days off, I try to write/blog/read first, so if I run out of time/caffeine by the end of the day, the other stuff (cleaning/errands/miscellaneous) will get cut

As I keep up this crazed, caffeine-charged juggling act, I can’t forget why I have so many balls in the air. The reason behind the madness is my passion for writing, and the goals I'm working toward. These can’t fall by the wayside. Keeping up the juggling act is hard work, but hopefully, one day, accomplisihng my dream will be the ultimate reward.

Balancing Work with Passion

In the past few weeks, I’ve been struggling with this question:

How do I balance what I need to be doing to survive with what I should be doing to achieve my dream?

A little back story… Three months ago, I took a second part-time job (who’s offering full-time jobs these days?). It’s a steady position with set hours. I kept my part-time position at a retail bookseller where I’ve been for almost five years. The schedule there varies each week; sometimes I work 15 hours a week while sometimes I’m close to 30. Many times (already) I’ve had to work doubles and even weeks straight without a day off. It’s affected my health, happiness and of course, my writing. However, I’m finally able to pay my bills and save a little something every month.

So, where do I draw the line between happy, healthy and pursuing my dream of being a YA writer while working two jobs (up to 50 hours a week and 19 days straight at the longest) to keep my head above water and build my savings?

                *crickets*

Here’s where I’m supposed to share my brilliant, poignant, life-changing answer, right? Except I don’t have one. There isn’t a solution, perfect or otherwise. In short, I don’t know what to do.

I know that big quit-my-job (at least one of them) moment won’t happen for me. There are solid advantages to both positions. I’ve thought a lot about which one I should pursue further, which one I would keep if it came to that, but there’s no easy answer. Ideally, someday in the future, I would leave both jobs and be able to make a living with writing. Then my passion would be my work. However, I'm not there yet. 

On an optimistic note, there are a couple things I’ve done/plan on doing that may help.

1.       Say “NO”            

This is the classic: “No I can’t pick up that shift.” “No I can’t take on that commitment.” “No I can’t do this/that/the other thing.” Unless it's family or writing-related, I probably shouldn't take time away from writing for it.

2.       Kick my boyfriend out (temporarily)

We spend time together most days of the week, but occasionally I should take an hour or two from our time to spend with my words. And he can spend it with his music.  

Basically, I’m tired of using my jobs as an excuse not to write. It’s like justifying ignoring my passion by saying work is more important just because it pays the bills. And that’s just depressing. The end-all-be-all is that my writing is should be a need. It needs to be a need.

               *scurries off to work on that*

Are you in the same position, struggling to balance writing (or your passion) with everything else? How do you take on that challenge? Let me know in the comments!

Blog-iversary

One year ago, I began this blog by declaring myself a writer. That post was revolutionary for me. Not only did I tell the world (or the 34 people who viewed that post) that I was a writer, but I was admitting it to myself. I was allowing myself to be a writer. Officially. This year, I want to take a look back over the year since I posted that dirty little secret, remind myself that I can still legitimately call myself a writer and consider all there is still to accomplish.

Over the past year, there have been some changes in my life. I moved to Indianapolis. I started a new job, left an old one and transferred an even older one. (If that doesn’t add up, it might help to note I have 2 jobs.) Also this year, I wrote the first full draft of my WIP, one of my biggest writing accomplishments to date.

On the blog, I shared my NaNoWriMo journey and I resolved to write as well as to read in 2013. I shared my most anticipated new releases for each season and my must-read teen books. I started traveling through fiction (so far just to London and Chicago). I wrote about love, sex and leaving. I wrote to my 15 year-old self. I wrote about lessons I learned from Neal Shusterman and Libba Bray. I made discoveries and shared adventures. And I took my declaration to the world.

Shout out again to my camera guy/boyfriend.

 

This year has been one giant leap forward in the me-being-a-writer-for-real scheme of things. I’m proud that I’ve been writing weekly on the blog since September. I’m proud to say that I’m a NaNoWriMo winner. I’m proud that I’ve been reading a ton, tweeting a lot and writing a reasonable amount. (Not enough though. Never enough.)

However, I still have more to accomplish in the coming years. I’d like to write more yet keep up with my reading. I’d like to keep posting every week on this blog. I’d like to work more towards the resolutions I set out to accomplish in January (to complete by June, but I’m not focusing on the deadline). I’d like to double my NaNoWriMo wins. And eventually I’d like to be published. (Fingers crossed that it’s sooner rather than later.) Mostly, I’d like to keep dreaming and keep working toward those dreams.

Wish me luck! (I may need it.)

A Year in Numbers

Posts: 46

Views: 2549

Most-Viewed Post: Teen Books-to-Movies 2013 &Beyond (244 views)

Least-Viewed Post: The Definition of Unputdownable (5 views)

 

One Lucky Day

Today is my birthday. (Please, no singing.) That is correct, I am a red-head* born on St. Patrick’s Day. Everyone always thinks/assumes that I’m Irish. Although I have a fascination with Ireland and Celtic history, the truth is I have very little Irish blood. (I’m mainly Belgian.) Either way, I’ve always celebrated St. Patrick’s Day because it’s my birthday, and fusing the two together has always been enjoyable.

When one thinks of St. Patrick’s Day, they think of leprechauns, pots of gold at the end of rainbows and merrily wishing each other “Good Luck!”

 

      luck        noun \ˈlək\
      a: a force that brings good fortune or adversity
      b: the events or circumstances that operate for or against an individual

Luck is a finicky thing. It can be good or bad. It’s a combination of ability, opportunity, good timing and coincidence. Some may consider it lucky that I was born on St. Patrick’s Day with red hair. It’s more coincidence. One may think it is good luck they beat the crowd at the coffee shop. It’s more good timing.

 

      “Luck is preparation meeting opportunity. If you hadn't been prepared when the opportunity came along, you wouldn't have been 'lucky.” –Oprah Winfrey

When events out of one’s control go well or badly, luck can be thanked or cursed. Usually, these events can be attributed to someone’s own ability, choices or even opportunity. Don’t get me wrong, I am a believer in luck. However, true good luck is rare. (As, hopefully, true bad luck is.) When you encounter it, make sure you take it for what it is, and thank your lucky stars.

Wishing everyone a lucky St. Patrick’s Day!

Just for fun, here are a couple Irish-themed YA books:

 

*Please Note: I am not a ginger.

The Experience of Imperfect Travel

 

When I write, I draw inspiration from experience and dream. Some of my paramount experiences have taken place while traveling. There is majesty in walking a city where cathedrals were built before this country was founded. There is mystique in knowing that the people you’re walking past most likely wouldn’t understand you if you speak. There is a certain freedom that comes with getting lost somewhere foreign.
 


Getting lost in Ghent

Not to discount domestic travel, but I’ve rarely felt out of place within America. I can blend in while hiking in Utah or lying on a Floridian beach or striding down the streets of NYC. I am at home in the US and even though accents may differ, the language does not. There is a feeling of safety for me, there is a known set of values and a relative understanding of the law. Abroad, however, these things can be fleeting. Values can differ. Language is rarely a common factor. Abroad, I know I don’t belong, which is when things get interesting.  

               “Travel is glamorous only in retrospect.” ― Paul Theroux



Walking along Omaha Beach

I speak of my travels with longing, but the truth is that they were not always enchanting at the time. I’ve run my hands through the sand at Omaha Beach. But to get there I rode in a bus with three dozen other twenty-somethings and slept in a hostel four people to a room. I’ve been to the top of a Swiss Alp, but on an overcast day, where the clouds engulfed us and the view was just fog, thousands of feet up. There were days I missed important trams and trains. There was overpriced food, and days of drenching rain. There were tears, uncertainty and the empty feeling that one can only know when thousands of miles from home.



Disappearing into the clouds in the Alps

That’s where experience comes from, the flawed days where you almost get stuck in an unknown Dutch city after dark. The days where you wake tired because the drunk Australians came back to the hostel at 2AM then snored until the sun came up. Or the day on the Brussels tram when British ex-pats make fun of your homestay mother because they thought you couldn’t understand them.  
 



Beautiful day in Antwerp

That’s where words come from, the experiences that are imperfect. The ones that were a trial at the time, but are now an amusing anecdote or appealing short story. Because the essence of a story doesn’t come from a pristine day hiking outside Dublin, but in the days of pouring rain and near failure. The imperfect days abroad helped shape me and my writing.

Lessons from a Month of Writing

For the past 25 days, I’ve been engrossed in NaNoWriMo. I’m 42242 words into my manuscript. That means I’m 7758 words from being a NaNo winner! Here is what I’ve learned so far:

Plan ahead

To write a novel in a month, I had to be prepared starting Day 1. In October, I wrote a six page outline of my story. It wasn’t important that I stuck to this outline, but it was necessary that it existed if I needed something to fall back on. I wrote out character descriptions, came up with names and created settings from the ground up. I even bought poster board and drew a map of my fantasy world. I prepared the building blocks of my story (in a handy, travel-ready binder) so when November came, I could just write.

 

Don’t (over) think, just write

I stressed over word choice too many times this month. I let myself think over the word “walk” or “turn” or “like” for a few minutes before just typing it anyway so I could get on with the story. I forced myself to type out the simple, overused word so I wouldn’t get stuck. And I did it with this thought in mind: I can and will change it later, in edits. I realized that to write 2000 words a day, I couldn’t over think one or five or a dozen words, or I would never get anywhere. I just had to write.
 

Write even if you don’t want to

So many mornings I woke up and didn’t want to write. I wanted to go back to bed, hide under the covers or turn on the Today Show and zone out to Matt Lauer. Some days I woke up with a headache. Most days I had some excuse for why I shouldn’t write. But I had a goal to make, so I ignored the bed, the TV and the headaches. I put myself in front of my laptop (usually with the assistance of coffee) and wrote. If I hadn’t forced myself out of bed in the 7 o’clock hour every day this month, I wouldn’t be close to my current word count. I didn’t need the extra sleep, I needed the extra words.

You can still have a life and write

In October, I thought that to write everyday meant I wouldn’t do anything besides write and work. Reading would go by the wayside. Boyfriend time would be limited. And I could forget about being caught up on my Hulu queue. But, surprisingly, I slowly realized it didn’t have to be that way. If I did work, then I wrote before or after and still had a few free hours in the evening. If it was a day off, I churned out 2000 words before 11AM then had the rest of the day to read a book, watch Castle, hang out with my boyfriend or work on my blog.

Conclusions

This November, I learned about my writing habit. I discovered that waking up at 7AM and going straight to the computer works for me. I discovered that writing is an effort I have to make; it isn’t just going to happen by itself. And I thankfully realized that my life will not stop if I start a daily writing habit. Life and writing can co-exist. And I plan to keep up that coexistence into December and 2013!

A Short Note about Leaving

Leaving always brings mixed emotions.

It’s like the end of a book. You’re happy (usually) with the ending, but you’re sad there’s no more excitement left to read. A sense of satisfaction hopefully prevails.

Except for me leaving is just the end of a chapter. That chapter was called Bloomington, and was 4 years of college and 3 years of work. It was a rollercoaster of personal events.

For a week and a half, I’ve been living in a new city that I’ve only ever visited. It’s been a change of scenery, and change of habits. It’s not an exotic city by any means, and it’s not even a change of state. But Indianapolis is the capitol, and a sprawling Midwestern metropolis. And I’m excited to be here.

Writing has taken a back seat as I’ve settled into my new home, explored my surroundings and started the same job at a new store. But I plan to dive back into writing my story and this blog again soon.

I’m happy with this change, and the hopefully new opportunities life here will bring. And I’ll see you again soon!